16 posts tagged “life stuff”

Loathing:

• An Employment Insurance process that is way too clunky and DOES NOT accommodate teachers' very well.  (For example, I'm still employed by the school district, but not currently working for them 'cause, well, it's summer holidays!  But the system really doesn't have a space for that.  And they're really keen on you filing within 4 weeks of your last day of work, but for me that would mean losing out on top-up since my employer doesn't require me to file until the babe is born since, as mentioned, they know I'm still employed by them.  I'm going to go downtown tomorrow and talk to a real person about it, though I'm not confident: last time they told me that that, as a teacher, I only work 5 1/2 hrs a day because that's what my classroom hours are, so that's what I record;  this is important info because your EI amounts are based on previously worked hours and salary.  Fortunately, I got better information from both my union and my employer: Service Canada recognizes full time teachers as working 9.1 hours a day.  Thank goodness!  Because those 3 hours a night spent marking don't count???)
• Late-stage pregnancy sausage-toes.
• Insomnia.  (Yes, still.)
• Inconsistent tension when knitting.  (I think I'll need to re-start my project.  Bummer.

Loving:

• Living in a country where I get paid to stay home and look after my baby for 50 weeks after s/he is born.
• Being a part of a union that will top up that aforementioned paycheque to a percentage of my regular salary for some of those weeks after s/he is born. 
  
• That I'm having a little baby next month (or so!) and the sausage-toes will go away and so will the
  
• Insomnia - though I'll be awake more than ever, at least I know I'll start sleeping as soon as my head hits that pillow!
  
• Making things with my hands again. 
  
• Friends and family who visit.
  

Last weekend C. and I "got away."  It was lovely to be able to sleep in and make plans without reference to Gus for a couple days.  He thoroughly enjoyed his time with Grandma and Grandpa and had plenty of attention and activities: helping Grandpa clean the deck, making muffins with Grandma, going for walks and to the beach.  What more could a toddler want?

C. and I have had some stuff going on (yes, I know, it's a vague term, but I'm just leaving it at that for now) so we decided to take the weekend as a time of focused prayer and thought set aside to see what God might be teaching us, to help make clear the directions in which we should proceed since there seems to be no 'right' or 'wrong' in most situations in life.  And we had a wonderful backdrop in which to do all this: sunny ferry rides, a quiet condo with a great view, rocky points watching the tide come in, a city harbour with kayaks, float planes and sailboats sharing the water and cruise ships in the background.  There was lots of sun but the cool ocean breeze made it simply enjoyable and not exhausting for me.

We've been taking this week to think about, summarise, examine those things we'd noticed that weekend, things we felt God teaching us and I wanted to share a particular verse.  It's from Peterson's The Message, which is the Bible in contemporary language:  (While I wouldn't recommend one stake their spiritual sustenance solely on it, for someone like me who has read and studied the Bible for much of her life, the variation helps me hear it in a different way.)

On a good day, enjoy yourself;
On a bad day, examine your conscience.
God arranges for both kinds of days
So that we won't take anything for granted.

                      -Ecclesiastes 7:1

I feel like my life has been a gigantic to-do list lately.  Both my husband and I have long lists of stuff, and when he las lists, he feels the need to check everything off and won't rest until he does.  I sometimes remember to look at my list;  usually I don't.  (This frustrates him to no end.  When I forget something, he says "Just write it down."  "I did... I just didn't remember to look at my list.")

But lately I feel like I need to get my list done, too.  I totally blame the coming babe on this one.  I really want to not have to worry about moving furniture post-partum.   However, I can't do it all.  I must, must, must remember that I can't do everything when I'm 34 weeks pregnant and it's stinking hot outside.   My list should start to include things like "drink water," "find a mindless novel and read it," "nap," and "write posts where you don't complain about your life."  These things are important to my well-being, too. 

Now I just need to write it all down...

Disliking:

• The HEAT
• Insomnia
• Feeling like I'm still not prepared for this baby to come - everything from what to do with Gus when we head to the hospital, to labour, to how we'll deal afterwards.
  

• Our new van ('05 Toyota Sienna)
• Shelving from our favourite Swedish box store
• Which know means I can begin preparing the baby's room since we have storage for all my school and craft stuff and thus begin to feel like I'm at least working toward getting ready for this new kiddo.
• Grace (getting what I don't deserve)
  
• The time away with C.

Tomorrow I'm heading out on a road trip.  My in-laws made us an offer we couldn't refuse: Come down, drop off Gus with us and then hop on the ferry and stay at our (the in-law's) condo to get some time to yourselves before the new baby comes.

Uh, sure!

So I'm leaving ahead of C. tomorrow and Gus and I will visit my sister and compare bellies.  (She's due in October.)  Today isn't completely full, but full enough.  Here's what needs to get done:

• Make a phone call
• Clear off my desk and take a picture of it; we were given a newer and smaller one and this one is going to try and fetch us a few bucks off of Craigslist.
• Laundry - must start this early so that things can dry outside and I still have time to
• Pack
  
• Pick up a yogurt maker
  
• Email a friend I may get to drop in on in Victoria
• Record expenses for the last week (we try to keep track of everything we spend money on)
• Nap - two terrible nights of sleep in a row demands it

C'est tout!

Last week the school year ended and with that comes a break from work for me.  Since I'm due to have a baby in August, I won't be returning to work for the entire school year next year.  (For those who don't know, in Canada we get 50 weeks of maternity/parental leave from work; partially paid if you've worked 600 hours before taking leave.)

This last semester of work was very tough on me.  I do enjoy teaching, but life is hard to juggle with a family and friends to enjoy as well.  And my job is not just 9-5.  It is common to have to take home marking, or find I need to plan lesson x or prepare test y.  And reading and assessing 30 student essays takes some degree of focus and lots of time.  It all starts to wear on me after awhile.  I'm not as happy; it's tougher around the house, on my husband and my kid.  And then I find work not nearly as enjoyable either.

Don't get me wrong: I'm really glad I went back to work after Gus was born.  I didn't know how I would feel after having a kid and working or not working.  Returning to work showed me that, for now anyway, I don't feel like I need to be teaching.  (We are fortunate - we are not dependent upon my wage so working is a choice for me.)   I think that, had I not returned to work, I would have likely spent much time wondering, even yearning, to be back teaching.  (I wonder how that research project would work?  How could I re-vamp my novel unit?  I really want to try that assessment technique, etc.)  My hard heart would have needed much work; God mercifully spared me that by giving me the opportunity to find out for myself.

So, after a few months of enjoying fewer days of work than not, I was surprised to be in the last week of work wishing I was returning in September.  I forgot about that feeling; I should have anticipated it having been there before.  It was the desire to improve all those things where I felt I had failed my students in the semester previous - perfecting my craft for my students, and myself. (I also needed to remember that the year wasn't a washout - it's just easy to let thoughts of the weakness overwhelm the many successes and strengths to the year.)  Essentially, I want another 'kick at the can.' 

However, for this mama, that kick may not come for awhile.  With 2 babies to send to daycare, the economics aren't worth it, especially when, as I mentioned above, the rewards of my job just aren't stacking up.  I'm very, very glad I don't have to make that decision for awhile yet.  But I'm thankful for the options all the same. 

In the meantime, I'll open up a binder once in a while and jot down some more notes about how to tighten that unit on Macbeth, or try to develop a new thematic unit for my English 8s.  I should read Hamlet, too, one of these days.   I'll think about my mom, who started her teaching career at the same time I did (we graduated at the same time!), and know that there's still lots of time to head out into the classroom, be salt and light, and use the skills and giftings God gave me.

p.s. - Happy Fourth of  July to all my American friends!

When I start to complain about the weather.   If you'd rather not hear it, stop reading now.

So, so, so very hot.

Too hot.

I really don't do well in the heat.  And being 7 months pregnant with sausage-like toes and clothes that don't fit great doesn't help.

See, 39 degrees is just way too warm.  And I know, I know, I live in a semi-arid desert; I shouldn't have moved here, or should just get used to it.  Whatever.

I never thought I'd live in a place where I'd be so excited to see the forecast drop below 30.

We have A.C., but it's expensive and noisy for our neighbours, who don't have A.C. at all because their landlord is a cheapskate.  I feel like I'm just rubbing it in.

I'm going to try to sleep now.  Wish me luck.

This morning was heralded in by songbirds chirping and a beautiful blue sky with a few clouds that soaked up the pink hues of the rising sun and then bathed the rest of the world with the same pink glow.  It was gorgeous.

It was also a scene I should have happily slept through.

I couldn't fall asleep until after midnight and then woke up with the birds, just before 4:30.  Sleep was elusive then - my mind was moving too quickly.

I'm heading to bed very, very soon.  I don't want to get ill or feel ill.  And feeling good has been tough lately; I already missed a workout this week because I forgot to bring my shoes to the gym (again!).  On the bright side, my mind should be shutting down quite shortly: marks are in!  Now the days are free for me to clean my classroom, organize my materials (which will take days) and supervise an exam or two.  Only 7 days of work left!

Good night.