74 posts tagged “life stuff”

Loathing:

• Fatigue.
• Runny noses, fever, teething.  It's been that kind of week.
  
• Making dinner.  (What's with me?  Usually I don't mind this task.)
• Finding food for a picky eater.
• Slow-ripening tomatoes.  
• Hearing the phrase, "But I don't want Peaches to get [toy du jour]!" shrilly and repeatedly, all day.  Day after day.
  

• Getting to the gym.  Started incorporating more weights workouts!
  
• The 090909 postcard swap I participated in last week.  Already have 4 of my 9 cards.
• The cool folks in my bible study small group.  Missed 'em this summer.
• Re-reading my favourite bits in Lord of the Rings.
• Knitting, especially when I have the correct tension.
• Hot weather that really isn't that hot.
• When Chris comes home.
• And these kiddos:
  

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Earlier this week I loaded up the kids in the chariot and we biked downtown to the Farmer's Market.  Scored a free cantaloupe* to make up for the one I bought last week with worms in it.  The farmer was stunned and even had me take a bigger one than the one I originally bought. (But is it really a score if it's a replacement?  You decide.)

But that's not the point.

I walked past a (probably the) mom with her daughter lounging in a stroller - she's probably 18 - 30 months I'd guess - and that girl was sucking back a bottle (not sippy cup) of coke (or pepsi)! I was stunned.  And yes, I'm sure because it was a clear bottle and I could see all those lovely carbonated bubbles bouncing around there. 

So I did it anyway as I passed her by, even though I didn't want to.

Why on earth is she giving her daughter that!!!!!
She's obese, and that little girl isn't really little... oh my - the health problems!
Why!?!

Yes that ugly judgement monster rolled right on through my brain.  Yes, I think there are times when parents can step in and maybe give a gentle suggestion or idea to another parent, but those instances are few and far between - or at least they'd better be.  We all have a tough enough go at parenting as it is and coming down on someone else for the places they're not perfect really doesn't help anyone. 

So I've tried to be kinder to her in my thoughts:

Maybe it was a treat.  It's not like I've never given Gus or Molly something that wasn't completely 100%organicwholegrainsugarmsgadditivefatfree.
Mom's carrying a lot of extra weight; it's got to be really hard to break patterns in the family.

We've all got our stuff we don't like to do, or things we think we ought to be doing, and even though the voice in my head that says, But it was pop!  So bad!  is louder right now, I pray this voice takes precedence:

But by the grace of God go I.

*If you ever get the chance to eat melons that have been picked that morning - take it!  I don't even like melons but I can tell just be smell and the bit I've tried that they're so superior to those in the store.

As I'm sure many of you have noticed, September has arrived. 

Oddly enough, I've been looking to this date for a little while now.  Sure, some of you will say, it's just because you're sick of the heat.  Too true, I'd have to reply. 

However, it also has a lot to do with the fact that for the first time since I was, say 4, that I'm entering this season without going back to class (either as a student or teacher) or dealing with an infant (as both my babes were arrived in August).

Instead, I feel like I'm just now beginning the life of a stay-at-home mom.  Suddenly, I can enter the season thinking about how I'll fill my time (instead of just trying to get enough sleep from day to day) and the time of my kids.  I entertain questions such as:

• Should I register Gus for some kind of music class? 
  
• Will I get out enough and see friends? 
  
• How long can the kids play on their own and quietly while I read?  Or knit? Or blog?
• Can I get out the gym regularly?
• Lunches.  What should I feed them for lunches?
• And the house.  How tidy does it really need to be?

Lunches?  Cleaning?  These are all things I'm already seeing to, yet suddenly this change in my status (from on maternity leave to stay-at-home-mom) makes me feel like I should somehow be stepping things up a bit.  I'm resisting this feeling that I should be doing things, like making fantastic meal plans or instituting a timely and perfect house cleaning schedule.  After all, I'm not working, so I should be filling me time with, well, work-like stuff.  Right?

Ha. 
I've decided I could do all these things.  Maybe I even will.  Oh, ok.  I'll be realistic - my house will never be dust free, no do I care so much about it.  But the difference between should and could is far.  No mom needs to find extra things to fill in a day when they've got offspring to rear.  I'll fill my days as I have so far: keeping the kids alive and happy and reducing the daily clutter to a dull roar so it doesn't stress out Chris too much.  (See, if he stayed at home, our house would be much cleaner.)  I'll keep reading and knitting and blogging and getting together with friends and going to the gym.  The kids will enjoy friends and outings and naptimes, too.  I'll bet they even turn out ok for it all. 

Autumn.  The more things change, the more they stay the same.      

My Charges... Cuties, eh? :)

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About half an hour ago, Gus asked for his blanket shortly after we got home from running errands.

I was nursing Peaches on the couch.

"It's in the bag, right behind you," I said.  (Really, just an arm's length away - his arm.)

"I want you to get it."

"No Gus, you can get it yourself.  It's right there."

But he won't.
Instead he's spent the last half an hour whining and moaning.  I want you to get it.

I guess one of us is going to have to cave soon.  Anyone who has spent time with a toddler knows it's probably going to be me.

Ick and Blah:

• The birthday boy threw up yesterday.
• He also ran a fever (and is still a bit today).
• I now qualify in the category of You know you're a parent when... you catch vomit in your hands.  In this case, it really wasn't adequate.  Yucky!
• Rinsing out the sheets.
• More laundry.
• Spending an hour sitting with Gus in the bathroom where he insisted on being, crying and moaning and not letting me cuddle him, certain he was going to throw up again.  
• Those pesky three pounds came back - and then some!  Grrrr.
  

• Started a new book: The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society.  I like it.
• Leaving on a road trip in a couple of days - through the Rockies to Wild Rose Country to see family and friends.
• Kids are happily entertained by toys or home videos right now, enough that Mom can write on the internets and read a book.  (No sooner did I type those lines than I had to get up to rescue a book.  sighs.)

1. Gus turns three today!

2. He got a BC Ferries boat that came with three vehicles to load and unload all morning long.

3. We gave him three presents that cost about as much in dollars: A kid shovel, a frisbee and chocolate-covered apricots.

4. Chris and I have been parents for three years.

5. Three is the number of times I got up with Peaches last night and it's started to wear on me.

6. It's the number of pounds I've lost according to the scale at the gym, which means its also the number of pounds I'm set to gain back any day now.

7. It's the number of months one of my very good friends has been pregnant.  Just found out yesterday!  :)

8. I went to three grocery stores to get all my good this morning.  Sadly, one trip wasn't worth it since they were all out of blueberries.

9. It's the third time Herpes Zoster went live in me: first when I was little and got the chicken pox and now it's my second go-around with shingles.  Thankfully, it's mild and the pain is minimal to non-existant.

Three of Us

And here ends the list.  It ought to be divisible by three itself, no?

When I was 14, I had the opportunity to take a 3 day drive south to Northern California.  My grandparents were treating me and two of my cousins to this trip which we enjoyed immensely.  (Kudos to my grandparents who put up with the music of three teenage girls for the duration!)  It was not my first trip to California, but it was the first time I really recalled the heat.  I can't remember how hot is was (or wasn't) but I do remember being getting frequent headaches and wanting to spend a lot of time on couches in the afternoon.  Sure, I probably needed more water, but what I remember is all the locals (unhelpfully) saying things like, "Oh, this isn't really hot at all.  It's actually quite comfortable."

I guess all my state did was to reinforce any stereotypes they may have already had about Canada being all cold, all the time.

Fast forward to 5 years ago when we learned that Chris's job was being transferred away from the suburbs of the left coast to the interior of the province.  We were quite happy with this prospect for many reasons.  My only real concern, though a weak one at that, was how I was going to deal with the notorious heat.  Though it's not the warmest place in the province, it's up there, with this small region labeled semi-arid desert.

My trip to California was recalled to mind as we experienced another heat wave.  This one had our daily highs in the high thirties for about three weeks.  (That's about 98 - 103 degrees Fahrenheit.)  I know much of the Pacific northwest has taken part in the same, breaking temperature records. 

And I realized even more thoroughly than I had known before just how much I do not like the heat. I feel like I tolerate it.  I endure it.  As much as I'd simply like to enjoy it, to do so requires much effort on my part.  While some people begin to notice the effect of the cold, dreary and dark weather of the winter on their personalities, I find I have a similar response to the heat.

For me, living with the heat is about:

• sleeping without sheets (which I don't really like) and forget cuddling because who wants another furnace right next to you?
• staining my clothes with sunscreen while trying to pin down a toddler who honestly doesn't think he's moving as he reaches for this, or turns his head there.
• monitoring our indoor/outdoor thermometer and opening and closing the windows accordingly to maintain maximum cool.  In the words of Mad-Eye Mood - "Constant vigilance!"
• ditto the doors.
• building meals around not using the oven.  Why heat the house and spend time next to a hot-box?  So out goes biscuits and pizza and a lot of other things I like to make.
• getting out early in the day and hunkering down for the afternoon.
• listening to the water bombers wheel around overhead heading to or returning from the myriad of forest fires in the area.
• getting used to feeling sticky.
• laundry drying in no time. 

We've been having those days - the ones where it starts out all sunshiney, then gets hot, then windy and when you go to the park, you feel like you're just walking in a hair dryer.

It's looking like rain.  Or lightning.   This means more fires in our parched forests.  Well, that, along with the asinine behaviour of campers who don't put out their campfires, will likely mean Chris being at the office during the weekend again. 

All this is a meaningless preamble to my thirteen things, because that is what I do if I feel like it on Fridays.

1. I made a matchbox.
2. I have fulfilled a wish for my sister.
3. I've enjoyed watching my daughter crawl in and out of her fort repeatedly.
4. I hosted friends for an overnight visit.
5. I've wished we made more time to visit people ourselves.
6. I've returned books.
7. I ate ice cream.
8. I've done laundry.
9. I took a tour of a fire hall.
10. I've cuddled a two year old.  In this case, it was my own.
11. I've discovered that my patience of my political representatives is running very, very low.
12. I was a confidante.
13. I missing someone who hasn't even left yet.

Remember - only YOU can prevent forest fires.

Thankful.
[The week started out well, despite Chris's 4 day and 3 night planned absence for work.  There was lots of love and calls and even an evening when friends brought by food, cleaned my kitchen then stayed while my babes slept I got to the gym for a great workout.  The body of Christ serves me.  I am grateful.]

Rooted.
[We had some good days, the kiddos and I.  We stuck close to home.  I felt it best since it was the first time Gus really had a grip on what Daddy being gone meant - we was clingy to Chris just before he left and lately hasn't really been excited at the idea of going out, though he's ok when we do.  But this time around, home was best.] 

Solo.
[Chris was scheduled to be home in time for dinner on Thursday night, but that was not taking into account a large forest fire, and the role he plays as the map guy for provincial emergencies for our region.  Late work on Thursday, a 12 hour day on Friday (when we thought he'd be home) and about 8 hours at the office during the weekend, most of which was during the evening dinner and bedtime hour.  Though he was in and out, I began to feel more alone than I did the days before.]

Unwell.
[Saturday night Chris was home for a few hours.  We decided to go out for dinner - treat ourselves with that overtime pay.  We walked into the restaurant and three...two...one: Gus threw up.  A lot.  We got some pizza instead and ate at home.  Over the next 2 days, both kids would empty their stomach twice and Chris and I would experience unsettled stomachs.  Oh, and my eyelid swelled.  It's better now.]

Weary.
[It's not about the sleep, though I find I need a lot of it.  It's not even about the kids being sick, it didn't change up our routine too much except add a load or 2 of laundry and add disinfectant to the grocery list.  I feel like I need to recharge, but I'm not sure how: workout?  books?  my journal and a latte?  nap?]

In about five days, the province I live in is holding an election to fill up our legislature again.  I think I've decided for whom I'll vote, but I feel like it's a lesser of evils; I just can't find the right combo of party policy, leadership qualities and representative acumen.  I'm starting to get rather depressed about it.

However, for me, this election cycle has a lot less to do with who we send back to represent us and more to do with deciding how we do that in the future.  Along with casting ballots, we're also being asked to decide whether or not we want to change our electoral system from the current first-past-the-post system.  It's called the Single Transferable Vote (STV) and is a form of proportional representation (used in many, many European counties) with our form being almost identical to that of Ireland. 

I've done a lot of reading on the subject from both sides of the argument.  I recognize fully that there will be some not-so-great possibilities, but no worse that what we currently face and have decided that, in the balance, I think this electoral process is a good one and should be used here.  I feel like it would result in a legislature far more representative (truly) than our current system.  And I feel very strongly about this.

The 'yes' side to this debate has a lot of work to do.  It has to work against inertia.  STV isn't as obvious to people and it requires people take time to be educated.  It's far harder to effect change; people choose the path of least resistance and, given the time I've spent talking to different people and reading the letters to the editor and the sound bites on TV, I'm don't think that education is really happening.  No, I'm not saying that just because someone disagrees with me that they aren't educated on the subject.  What I am hearing, however, are a lot of statements made against the system, but when questioned further, they don't actually know how or even why those statements are or aren't true.  (There's a lot of misinformation out there, too.) 

Essentially, I'll be surprised if the referendum passes because I believe that people will take the path of least resistance and embrace the devil the know (so to speak.)

And this really, really, bums me out.  I get depressed and frusterated.  Chris gets angry. 

Last week while talking about democracy and politics, we realized that we're getting pretty riled about it.  We had to take a moment to realize that, though not insignificant, we can't let politics dictate our own attitudes and focus and response to life.  God is still God regardless of who governs, regardless of our electoral system.  Life marches on.
That thought calms me, encourages me.

And then the things of life happen around me: Joyful things.  Painful things.  People get sick and injured.  People make poor choices.  People make good ones.  Lives change unimaginably in a moment.  Suddenly I'm praying like I've been given new wind.  Life is marching on.  My mind swirls.  People become more important again.  Politics fade a bit.

I'll still vote next week.  I'll continue to ask that others do, too.  It is still significant, after all.  And though I may be disappointed (intertia, remember?) I can be assured that God hasn't changed, that people are imprortant and that joy can be found in a lot of places.